Monday, May 6, 2013

The good the bad and the um WTF its the Met Ball??- Met Ball "Punk Chaos to Couture"



Ok a few things (disclaimers) before we begin....

1.  The hardest thing to do is dress up a pregnant body for a night out let alone a black tie affair and super let alone the METBALL so we do understand....trust us...we've been there

2.  Just because you are wearing a rad/famous/expensive designer dress...doesn't mean you are event appropriate...fire your stylist or grab a new pair of balls

3.  You are not at the Oscars, Emmys or a movie premier...you are at the MET BALL thrown by VOGUE MAGAZINE (UM ANNA WINTOUR ANYONE??) and the COSTUME INSTITUTE... meaning costume...dress up...Anna..Vogue...every girls dream!!!!!


Whew... and now we can begin...Let's start with the bad news first.

When we say bad we don't mean ladies who took a chance and it just didn't pan out because if you took a chance at the Met Ball good for you...that's exactly what you should have done and we are sorry it didn't go as you planned it to go.

We are talking about the girls who just forgot where they were going or were too scared to try...


Emma Roberts- Huh???  You are young, cute and "hip"  Por Que??

Heidi- Heidi?  The oscars in 2005 called and they want their odd satin dress back


Beyonce- Oh no you don't BeyBey...NO you don't!  You may not wear brocade and leather a'la 1992 with brocade thighhighs a'la 2010 and think you own the carpet...no you may not.  Oh and we LOVE her so we must be right


Now for the Kates-

Kate Upton- WTF?  Much confused...like MUCHO

Kate Beckinsale- Maybe you didn't see the invite but it is the MetBall...thrown by Vogue and the Costume Institute asking for Couture Punk...not a boring Emmys dress with boring shoes


Katie Holmes- See Kate Upton



Now for the horrible news.. Kim...Kim...Kim... we are so so so sorry!  We are here to help.  We know how literally exruciating it is to dress a big ol pregnant body.  It aint fun!

But PLEASE for the love of fashion, style and Vogue...FIRE. YOUR. STYLISTS.  So far this whole pregnancy you have really gone array...

no need to wear maternity but you are insanely famous and wealthy you can have anything you want and desire..why did you desire this 80's grammy's couch fabric mess for the Punk- Chaos to Couture Gala?   It doesn't even hug your gorgeous belly correctly!


Ok that is off our chests...now for the good news!  Congrats gorgeous gals who gave a rats tush where they were going...who threw caution to the wind and said "WTF!  I'm here, I'm famous, and gosh darn it I'm gonna have a blast"

First up is our friend and lover Gwen... Gwen..bless you lover lips..bless you.  You nailed it back and forth and side to side.  Its perfection..through and through..
A.  Its F**KING Margiela!!!
B.  Its perfect for the Met Ball and for you
C.  Amazing...jealousy style amazing

Rooney!  We love it..thank you for not wearing black!  You look amazing!

Except 1 teeny tiny thing...those shoes... hmmmm lets rethink them...



And now for the models...ugh yup they do look amazing in EVERYTHING but these did it and did it just right...like Goldilocks

Doutzen



Cara


Ps MAJOR girlcrush going on with you...shhhhh


Coco


PS All pics lovingly "borrowed" from Just Jared thanks!!!



Who were your faves?  Not so faves?


Feel free to send this to everyone you know and don't cuz Things We Heart is comin back baybay...


xoxo things we heart